Balloon Girl

Balloon Girl

  • an image generated by ai prompted by the poem. your imagination was probably better.

    canary

    i do not know who chose to color
    the apartment across the street
    a soft baby blue

    sometimes i think
    i should like to live there
    and step onto its balcony
    in bright neon pink

    deep brown coffee in hand
    headphones black as night
    streaming red hot rage

    the yellow canary may fly away
    but it settles close to its cage

    Poetry
    canary, colors, lgbtqia+, poem, trans, transgender
    March 26, 2023
  • ai image generated through the text "expressionistic rendering of a new life, softness contrasts with the cold that will come now, a life that will look up all the music to hum now' your imagination was probably better than the image

    rebirth

    there are many questions i cannot answer about myself
    there are more that i do not know how to ask

    which means i live in a state of confusion
    in a body that resembles a hostile nation

    any friendship i find, therefore, has historically been unlikely
    because i assume everyone is either an enemy or a lover
    like my body has trained me to think

    i do not know what friendship is
    because all i have known is family

    the good, the bad
    the ephemeral, the fad
    the happy, the sad
    the sensible, the mad

    all i have known is family
    and i want to tell you

    that is what you were to me

    you were family in my mind
    you were cruel and kind
    you were far far away
    you were easy to find

    you were family to me
    you were stability

    and that was my illusion

    you were not my family but a friend
    i treated our relationship like it would never end

    thank you for being angry
    and helping me break out of the illusion

    thank you for showing me how to care
    i can care for myself now

    i have a therapist and meds now
    i have work and nice beds now
    i wear clothes that are ironed daily now
    i am living my life gayly gayly gayly now

    thank you for teaching me how to be alone
    confused but with no fear of the unknown

    forever is no thing
    i want to be your friend now

    Poetry
    breakup, but is it, family, found family, friendship, lgbtqia+, love, Poetry
    March 22, 2023
  • Angst Desiree, child of the fae born of disease, eats your pities Grimly Cool was a fool post-apocalyptic tool

    falsetto

    Angst Desiree was born with cactus for hair

    which in winter fell from scalp unto hell
    where it grew and grew and grew in the heat
    a ladder for demons away from the seat
    of Hades up to the head of Angst Desiree

    your fate is in the words you hear her say

    “hello and welcome to my life”

    fire glints off the knife
    where there’s blood
    ain’t no strife
    just a five letter word
    that rhymes with breath

    Angst Desiree, child of the fae
    born of disease, eats your pities
    you would cease your worries
    if you see what she sees
    crone on a crystal throne
    queen of all which is known
    thorns around her mind

    who could ever rise higher above her?
    who could ever find a reason to love her?

    —

    Grimly Cool was a fool
    post-apocalyptic tool
    laughed like a sinner
    dressed like a ghoul
    heart so warm
    never needed wool

    laughed when life was pretty wept when it was cruel
    every night she slept like a baby in a pool of drool

    you could never get Grimly to condescend
    to the sycophancy inspired by Desiree

    it was a lucky latitude where
    each crossed the other’s way

    —

    “move”

    “why”

    “i say so”

    “no”

    “you could die”

    “try”

    “why are you so, Cool?”

    “Angst was made for a fool”

    Poetry
    dark, dark academia, desire, lgbtqia, love story, Poetry, trans
    February 6, 2023
  • i am older than language, than poetry, than prose i am older than a name, i am older than a rose

    0/0/0

    i resent computers not allowing me
    to enter a birthday before the 20th century

    i am much, much older than that, Adobe Acrobat
    i am older than the form of print you choose to eliminate
    i am older than language, than poetry, than prose
    i am older than a name, i am older than a rose

    so by what power in whose command?
    can you tell me a birthday like 0/0/0 will not stand?

    Poetry
    hello world, is this where my thoughts live?, older and wiser, poem, Poetry, what's in a name
    December 27, 2022

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